The journey is “over”.
Three months ago I hung up my shoes and headed to Nicaragua to reflect. I’ve been back for over a month and I’m still reflecting. In some ways it feels anti climactic to come away from all of this with no answers, but I think that in itself was the exact meaning I was looking for. Life isn’t about finding a specific answer, or living by a set of rules. If we’re lucky we’re always asking new questions, uprooting new stones and continually taking new steps forward. Life lies in the efforts we make along the way. Our victories and failures are just new starting points. The experiences I had, the people I met and every single piece of support I got along the way continue to shape me in ways I could never express my graditude towards properly. For anyone reading this, I want to thankyou with everything I have in me for deciding to take part in this…even it for just a moment.
Happiness really is best when its shared.
I’ll leave you with the poem I wrote and read at an open mic as one of my last goals. It embodies a lot of my reasons for deciding to do this in the first place. Beneath it is my final video. I hope you enjoy.
Forgotten are the trees we used to climb. Our unquenchable thirst for uncovering stones has fallen to our feet leaving shadow where once we created light.
No longer do our window sills beckon for Peter Pan and Never Land is never more.
Tree forts give way to high rise apartments while swings weep silently, weightless in the breeze.
Hills are now obstacles to be climbed rather than rolled down, and puddles a nuisance instead of an impromptu pool party.
I never set out to be this ordinary.
The scope of our existence is tied to our spirit which in turn is directly linked to our day to day experiences.
How can one expect to tug on Super Mans cape if their insights keep them weighted to the ground?
I used to dream free of restrictions. My imagination was part of my world, not a separate identity. My only limits being an imaginary borderline keeping me safe within my neighbourhood.
Within a few city blocks my adventures were real and uncompromised. I waged war on dragons, built and re built a thousand castles and climbed to the highest peaks of the playground to survey my Kingdom below. In the span of a few city blocks I had it all.
Time however slips away quickly and as the world opens up around you, suddenly the ability to capture its potential narrows.
Peter Pan and the Lost Boys fly away. Sleeping Beauty falls back into slumber, Robin Hood disappears into the forest and the Teddy Bears pack up their picnic.
And all we can do is wave and say goodbye.
Adventure becomes a television screen or a foggy weekend hangover. The alarm clock is no longer the sun, bedtime no longer the stars and simple pleasures are suddenly not so simple anymore.
But who decides this to be steady truth?
I never set out to be ordinary; in fact I never set out to be anything other than who I was in the moment.
My life was based on the quality of my adventures. Free of burden I painted the world with brush strokes of creativity.
My future was directly tied to my present and my past was just that.
Never land may be never more and my soul may be tarnished, but life is still out there in its purest form for the taking.
The apparent freedom of unbridled ambitions is hidden beneath the stones now seemingly too mighty to move.
But within our strength of spirit and dormant imagination lies the lever to shed new light where darkness once loomed.
Shrouded in unfamiliarity it takes a wide eye and a settled mind to focus our altered perceptions of our limitations.
Look closely, all is not lost.
Within the joy of honest laughter we can reclaim our forgotten smiles and begin to shout at the top of our lungs just for the feel of it. We can cry tears of happiness and sorrow and never be afraid our emotions.
Remind yourself why we decide to love by holding hands a little tighter. Let yourself feel the warmth and rejoice in its embrace.
Ecstasy in life never reveals itself in moments of solitude. It is a shared experience free of expectations and hind sights.
Reclaim your innocence even for a moment and just let go.
Go home and build a fort out of cushions and hide under the kitchen table. Run with your chin way up in the air and somersault down the hillside. Jump in the biggest puddle you can find and then, if all else fails remember there is always a tree waiting to be climbed.
By – Scott MacKinnon